Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A Rant: SPAM Spam spam spam....


I hate spam.  Who doesn't?  What I really hate is the "Unsubscribe" option.  Listen, Bonehead, I never subscribed to your digital detritus and have no interest in it at all!  To unsubscribe, one MUST have subscribed.  It is an absolute law of our language!  Now, if you want to offer me the opportunity to un-spam myself, or "To reject our unsolicited marketing crappola, click here" then you might win my respect--but not my business.

I can only think of one spam solicitation I have ever attended to and grasped hold of in a transactional manner.  That spam email was for a unique product.  Dear Gussie, there is another word.  Can we all agree that unique means one.  Not rare, nor unusual, but singular.  One.  Only.  So, this unique product caught my eye and I continue to trade with that service provider today.  But the sea of spam I am awash in is all very common.  Are there any shortages of mortgage lenders?  Is the MLS down?  Then why are you sending me e-flyers of properties for which I have no actively shopping buyer-clients?  If you need a CE class in your field, could you find 20 to choose from without the aid of a spam concierge?  Yet I get 3-4 slices of spam a week telling me about every school for real estate brokerage continuing ed. options--ironically, I don't get any spam from the one source I will always use for CE.

Ok.  Enough.  One last confessional defense against a charge of hypocrisy.  I do send out a lot of postcards, letters, and real estate information to fill the mailboxes of my friends and acquaintances. Ah-ha!  In that confession lie three defenses against prosecution. 1) I use the post, not the email.  Isn't there a level of urgency with email that snail mail lacks?  2) I send out material that is intended to either inform or amuse, not merely solicit your dollars.  And, 3) I only mail to folks with whom I am acquainted or at least live near.

I now release you to your regularly scheduled programming...